After graduating from Bible School, we began our first pastorate in Okmulgee, OK. At first, everything went well and we seemed to be accepted by all the families. But after four years, we started to face some resistance. At times pastoring seemed like herding mules. Mules are stubborn and just refuse to be led. They won’t change and they won’t move. We tried to get organized but we offended people and our progress soon stopped.
Sometimes we were intimidated
When we entered the ministry, we were new to the things of God. Some of the people grew up in church and were more mature than we were, so that was intimidating to us. They also were used to being very involved in the running of the churches they attended. We had been raised in churches where most of the decisions were made by the leaders with some input from the people. We had been advised to be strong leaders and make decisions.
When we began the church, we discovered that the folks who were coming had a different vision than we did. They had been waiting a long time for a church in the area and wanted to buy a piece of land and build a sanctuary on the main highway that went through the town. We chose to start in a banquet room at a local motel. Some wanted to start a prison ministry and other outreaches that we did not feel ready to handle.
The church building became a big issue. Two years later, when we did find a building, most of the people were disappointed, for we chose a building in a poorer side of town. We never asked their opinion; we just went ahead with our plans.
Not all of the families in Okmulgee resisted our leadership. Some were very supportive, but there were always those who seemed dissatisfied.
These people are like Wild Horses
One day the Lord spoke to me and told me that these people were like wild horses. It gave me some understanding about the people, but I knew very little about wild horses and concluded that the people were unruly and would not be tamed.
Years later though, I met a rancher who raised horses out West. I asked him if he knew how to tame a wild horse.
“Oh, yes”, he said. “The whole procedure is quite simple, but doing it right takes a lot of time.”
“To successfully tame a wild horse, you must first develop his trust. You have to prove to him that you are not going to hurt him. This is accomplished by speaking quietly, gently and easily to the horse. You must pat the horse, move slowly and not make any sudden gestures. This is the first step.
“The next meeting might involve talking to the horse with a little more authority and then moving a little closer to him, always letting him know that you are not going to do anything that would alarm or damage him in any way. This can go on for many visits until the time comes that a saddle can be placed on the horse’s back, so he is accustomed to the feel of the straps and the weight of the saddle.
“Finally, the day arrives when the rider mounts and rides the horse around the pen. If this whole procedure is done correctly, the horse accepts the rider and does not become frantic. It requires a lot of patience and a lot of time.”
“The problem is that many cowboys come to the corral on the first day, whip the horse, throw the saddle on his back and begin to ride, spurs and all. They try to show him who is boss. The horse usually bucks and rider is thrown off. The rider gets angry and the whole thing goes on over and over again until the horse is ‘broken’. In time, the horse will be whipped into shape, but he will always fear the rider and trust between the two will never be built. It is bad for the horse and hard on the owners.”
I finally understood what God had been trying to tell me.
I thought of how impatient we had been with the people. Some times were downright pushy and wanted our own way. We tried to shove all our plans and ideas toward them without bothering to gain their trust. Instead of being open to their ideas, we were insecure and did not want to be questioned.
We saw the potential for ministry in their lives and wanted the best for them, but we focused on their faults and rebelliousness. We saw them only in their present state and not what they could become. This information about horse training would have helped tremendously years ago.
Have the grace to listen to people and their ideas. Sometimes people just need someone to talk to and air their ideas. They just want to feel like a part of the group. You never know when someone will have a beneficial idea. How we wished that we would have sat down with them and heard their ideas and plans for the church. We would have been enriched to gain from their valuable experience.